Talkabout

05/10/2008 @ 00:01 mooge said:

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I was thinking why life sometimes feel like an emotional roller coaster sometimes, with its ups and downs and how this can also be like feelings, feeling okay in a moment and then feeling down in the next.I was speaking to someone the other day about how emotions are something which are not rational nor systematic and we don't have much of a say on what we feel. How much of what we then feel influences our thoughts and then our actions towards others and ourselves.

I'm realising that the more I understand my feelings and can name them the less overwhelmed or confused I feel about things. As this is a site about emotional well being, I was wondering how others are feeling at this very moment, as this moment is the only moment that we really have or can live?
05/10/2008 @ 06:52 rif said:

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Yeah Mooge - though I reckon it is a roller coaster on a big see saw as the ups and downs don't seem to have much roll in them. I think you on to something about what you said being able to recognise the names of feelings - I must be a real dope sometimes because I think I am sad but that is just one of the things I am feeling and I work out I am angry too and I just can't seem to work out more than one thing at a time.

How am I feeling now? well I feel okay = pretty good and not up or down - safe in the middle.

I got a phone call from my dad again who wants to go for a drink with me again - last time he just went on an on about mum - I don't know what he expects me to do so I feel a bit dirty on him because I don't want to have to get into his stuff. They didn't want me living there because I "made them argue" now they both want to whinge to me. don't know if you should bother with this . Do I owe them anything? That's what I have to think about. Do I have to lose a decent mood for them?
05/10/2008 @ 19:20 ihaveissues said:

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I was touched when I read your comment that you were thinking about me today. I haven't been on this site since I last posted that brick and I had figured everyone had forgotten about me. I was surprised that you would take the time to check up on me and seem genuinely concerned about my well being. To answer your question as well as the question in your post that I am commenting (hopefully I am still unsure about how this site works) At this particular moment in time I feel scared and lost. I didn't realize how strong these emotions were until I read your question and thought about it for a while. But I guess it explains the reason I decided to randomly check up on this site after no being on it for so long. I experience the emotional roller-coaster that you described. I can go from feeling in complete control to complete failure in a matter of minutes. Right now I am very anxious and scared about my midterm on Tuesday. I am not prepared at all and I feel like I am going to fail or forget everything. I also don't feel as if I have studied enough. My friends seem to study all the time and it makes me see my studying as inadequate. As for my health...I am falling. Slowly but surely. I am fighting my anorexia everyday, but it is getting harder and harder to fight the ever strengthening urge to starve and purge. I feel very weak and pathetic. The girl in the next dorm room is also Anorexic and we have begun to form a bond. She and I can relate well to each other. But I still feel very alone.
05/10/2008 @ 20:23 mooge said:

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Hello ihaveissues, it's really good to hear from you.
Oh dear exams! What a load of stress and anxiety they seem to conjure up hey? I'm not surprised you're feeling anxious and scared, they are so horrible, but I suppose we still have to do them. I always thought and still do think how unfair exams are as so much depends on your performance on the day itself. Thinking about doing something good or even just making plans for the following weekend seemed to put things into perspective for me and make me realise that life goes on after the dreaded day.
Anyway, what is it that you're studying? Do you enjoy it? From reading your post it sounds like you're pretty hard on yourself, comparing yourself to others, thinking that you are not working as hard as they are. I know for myself that a trait of anorexia is perfectionism, which means working bloody hard and being very competitive with others (and that you want to be the best at it all) to the extent that you don't give yourself much of a break. So I was wondering whether you are having a chance to take some time out and chill a little in between the studying?
I hope that you can find this site helpful - a sort of place where you can unload your worries and feel free to say and think what you want (I know I do). Anorexia can be such an isolating illness so i mean this even more so - keep writing. I am hear and listening (well reading!) take good care and have a break from time to time. Mooge
05/10/2008 @ 21:59 mooge said:

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Hello Rif, you know I think that its okay to work out one feeling at a time - its great that you can do this in itself. Glad to here that you are feeling balanced at the moment (but I suppose I'm responding after you've written this so that feeling might have changed?)

Of course I should bother with this - isn't that what this site is about and if I didn't want to then I would just not respond. I think that we don't owe our parents anything in that way - we were not asked to be born. I think genuine gratitude for things blossoms itself and sounds resentful if its given when asked for. It's a good point you're raising there - what if parents put their stuff on their children and influence their child's mood. In my understanding people should be responsible for their own emotions and contain them and not dish them out to others (easier said then done though). I believe the most important thing is to do what's right for yourself and what feels right for you. And if possible work out what's the feelings being given to you from your parents. Quite often I feel guilt and obligation towards mine and it takes me a while to figure this out and then decide what it is that I would be happy with and would be okay compramising. Well I hope this offers something to churn over at least. All the best, mooge
13/10/2008 @ 06:56 trying said:

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I find my feelings change a lot and quite quickly. This un-nervers me. I feel unstable because of it. I don't like it and I wish I had more control over my feelings. Does anyone know if that's possible?
I see my feelings on a spectrum whizzing back and forth from elated and happy to feeling awful and scared. I know all I want in my life is to be content, if I was content in myself then I think not much else would bother me or upset me. I often feel guitly especially around food and when Ive eaten it. Trying x
13/10/2008 @ 21:00 mooge said:

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hello Trying, It sounds like you are really thinking about things. I don't know if we can control our feelings but I think that when we begin to understand them we can begin to have more 'control' over our behaviour and how we react to situations and towards people and ourselves.
I haven't thought of feelings being along a spectrum before - can feelings be on a linear plane? If they were where would you place anger? You mention contentment, what would that mean for you? It's good to read your response. Take care, mooge
15/10/2008 @ 17:04 mooge said:

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Something dawned on me today when I was doing something very ordinary - how feelings can sit side by side next one another, so you can hate and love the same person at the same time. I think that I've known this on an intellectual level for quite some time but actually having an emotional understanding is something that I hadn't grapsed. I was thinking that some confusion about feelings might be around that idea - how we can appreciate intellectually that we feels many feelings at one time but understanding it emotionally is more complicated. What does anyone else think or feel about this? mooge
17/10/2008 @ 06:59 Arf said:

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I dunno really wot all that stuff up there really means to be honest. But over and over that the woman from the drug place tells me to stop thinking and just feel and look inside. Do u no wot I mean?